Look up. Up in the sky. Its a Kurd. Its a Hussein. Its weapons of mass destruction. Sorry. Another false positive. Another bungle. Only Vigoro. Liquid Plumber. Saddams moustache wax. A-1 Steak Sauce. Heres Paul. Heres Wolf. Heres Paul Wolfenblitzer, Alka Frankenselzer, Tommy Blitzenfranker. Hes got Breaking News, Censored News, Good News, Military Approved News, A News Flash, Police State Okayed News, Freedom Fried News, Sounds Like News But Really Isnt News. Whatever. Its Day 27. Its Year Zero. Its Up To The Minute. Everybodys happy. Looking good. Taken a Baath Party. A Bubble Bath Party. A sponge bath. Wheres martial law. Wheres law and order. Prez sez lettem be. Lettem party. Muslim moshpit. Good visuals. Happy Baghdad. Happy America. Celebratory welcome. We come in peace. Smoke a peace pipe with Jessica Lynch. A lynch mob. Mob rule. Gimme a great big F. Gimme a great big U. Gimme Starbucks, Big Macs, Freedom Fries and 401ks. We took Kirkuk. Bombed Ramadi. Shot two children. Issued playing cards. Go fish. Iraqs most wanted. Deal me a hand. Wow. Its Udai Hussein. Its Qusai Hussein. Its Super Hussein. 55 pickup. Heres our guy. Ahmad Chalabi. Future leader. Future hero. Forty years, on the lam. Convicted for fraud. Nailed for theft. What a player. Man on the move. Ahmads got game. Its 911. Its 711. Its 8 Mile Road. The Angry Inch. Hawks are happy. Hawks are crowing. The Big One. Big Fat Victory. Ken Cakewalk Adelman. Dick Pearlhanded Perle. Chestpains Cheney. Jubilant. Bill Berlin Wall Kristol. Vindicated. War is good. Work works. Saddams tired. Saddams bushed. George is bushed. George Bush is Saddam Hussein. Its the day before. The day after. The day before the day after. Heres Hardball. Heres Crossfire. Heres the Capitol Gang. Butch Cassidy. The Hole in the Wall Gang. Be the first to know. Is Baghdad burning. Theres mayhem in Mosul. A wonderful moment. Mad as hell. Back to Basra. Armageddon. Battle of the Titans. Clash of Kultures. Its Francis Spellman. Francis Fukuyama. End of history. End of Fukuyama. Heres Hegel. Quote Nietzsche. Hail Heidegger. Ask Ari. Fleischer. The answers yes. The answers no. The fourth estate. Fourth World War. Pax Americana.

Tokyo Tues 04/15/03