POLITICAL SCIENCE VERSE

DEAD THREESOME

Known affectionately as the Godfather of Stumbling Down the Aircraft Steps, the scrappy former soul singer is probably best remembered as the man who happily murdered millions of his own people. While thousands thundered by, the body lay in a grisly Harlem night club, where it dangled quietly from the end of a rope. Among those shouting and cursing Americas 38th president were his four ex-wives as well as the current ex-dictator who was granted a complete pardon only one month after resigning from office. He the man, said Iraqs current prime minister. Raised in a brothel by his aunt, mobile footage on the web showed the former president exchanging insults with the first couple as they stood beside his flag-draped casket and bowed their heads. Later they met with the former first lady who shouted, Go to hell, then chanted the name of a Shia militia leader. Pop superstar Dick Cheney headlined a throng of fans, friends and family who paid a final soulful tribute to Iraqs former strongman at a fun- filled funeral ceremony in his adopted hometown of Grand Rapids. He is my biggest inspiration, Cheney said, his thin voice cracking with emotion. Nobody started lower and went higher, continued the civil rights activist who was once the brutal dictators electrifying road manager. I shall miss you and I love you so much, Cheney concluded, referring to the man renowned for his husky voice, dazzling footwork and tight rhythms. Following a day of national mourning, the body of the 38th president will be buried in an unmarked grave accompanied by full military honors and his back-up band laying down a steady beat of funk, disco and slaughtered sheep. The hardest-working man in show business reportedly fell through the trap in mid-prayer. As his body swung, broken-necked, on the rope, the crowd swayed, clapped and sang along. Known for his frequent costume changes and strategic use of doubles, the former presidents body will be moved by motorcade where there can be no healing without pardon. Im Black and Im Proud, the former dictator yelled at his tormentors. The ceremony will be telecast world-wide and can also be down- loaded from the web. Tokyo, Tuesday, 01/02/07