COME IN TOKYO

NEW IMPRESSIONS OF TOKYO

Inakamono means hick, rube; homesick souls floating to Tokyo, whereas Attamemashoka? translates, Would you like it heated up? Yesterday rained heavy. This morning was an earthquake in Kyushu. Tokyo has a complex network of trains and explanations for weather and natural disasters. Tokyo flows into Tokyo Bay where hostilities ended aboard a battleship with stovepipe hats and grainy black and white apologies. Sumimasen. Gomen nasai. Tokyo Dome is known affectionately as the Big Egg because of its oval shape. Yasukuni Shrine is known affectionately as Yasukuni Shrine because many Class A war criminals are buried there. High Noon wasnt filmed here and neither was Gunfight At The OK Corral. Nevertheless, Japanese still enjoy a good old-fashioned in-house investigation. The Japanese population is aging rapidly. At twenty-five, people look fifty. At fifty they have cosmetic surgery so they can look fifty again. Most salarymen take only one weeks holiday because theyre afraid they wont be here when they get back. Betsu betsu means Dutch Treat. In Kyoto, Pease come over, means Bugger Off!!! Made in Japan used to mean cheap and junky, but now it means Made in China. Following the latest train accident, the president of the railway apologized and offered the victims relatives a ten percent pay cut. The national soccer team are up to their old tricks. Coming out for the second coming then falling apart like a dead horse. The face in the ramen bowl, the body on the driving range, tell you its time for your yearly choke-up, time to blow another big putt or swallow a hidden fish bone. Tokyo, Tuesday, 06/13/06